mechanized

Dried paint scarred hands on the steering wheel, callouses growing every day. Finding it easier to breathe, and understanding that I can feel again. It's almost frightening feeling, but I have you to thank for that. G-d works in mysterious ways, and I've become resigned to that notion and okay with it, too. It's dark outside, long day of doing craftsman work, jobs meant for people with low IQs and no diplomas, but good work. Feels good feeling my muscles ache after working, old sweat crusted at the neck of my shirt. Window cracked, slight bit of air seeping in, faint smell of public transit in the air.

Car up ahead is stuck with its blinker on, wanting to get into the lane that I presently reside in. I tap my brakes, once twice, my car's haggard brake lights, 2/3 of what they should be, winks with two good eyes and one bad at the car behind me. I flash my brights at the idle car, who slowly gets in my lane. No clue who is in this toyota forerunner, but they get in front of me, and flash their emergency lights at me, just once, and it just made me smile, like mechanized smiles and nods. Something out of "Wall-E". Emotion and courtesy poured through rays of light. Just struck me as odd, and nice, and faint, and small, and unique, like this quiet little thing that happened between two cars and two drivers the rest of the world missed as they sped on by.

Life and love and everything summed up in ten seconds of two strangers obeying the law. And now they have gone off to wherever they go to. Home with family, out with friends, alone with dinner. Maybe they are alone, maybe they are not, but still feel like it, but in that brief encounter we interacted. We were humans, not cars.

One of my favorite things to do is to think about the lives of all the people in passing cars, how happy they are (without knowing me, hard to believe I know), what their lives are like, what they think, if they think, do they know love, everything. I am genuinely interested in complete strangers in the simplest of terms, and my overthinking mind gets wrapped up in the quick blurred smiles of children or the arguing on the cellphone mom, and I forget to look where I am going and constantly swim in my lane, slight swerves, gentle motions because of this breeze of lost in a world without me. And I know I am not the only one that does that, so if you see me as you drive by and we know each other, know that I am looking at you, too, and for a moment we are not machines being driven, or windows rolled up to keep everything out, but just two people catching glances and glimpsing into the lives of another person.

Roll the windows down.

Say hello.